How to Help: A New Perspective
If you are someone who loves someone misusing substances, it is likely that you want to help and want things to change. It’s also likely that you feel either incredibly overwhelmed or confused with where to start and what to do. Luckily there are lots of things you can do! And research has shown time […]
The Language of Change
Weather has been on the mind of many people lately. In the Northeast US, a storm hit that was labeled as a “Bomb Cyclone.” The name alone conjures up fear of destruction and terror. There wasn’t much difference between it and a more typical blizzard that we experience in the northeast, followed up by extreme […]
Why Are We Questioning Opiate Replacement Medications And Naltrexone For Opioid Dependence?
This article was first published on the Huffington Post in September, 2017. If you decided to take charge of your health and quit smoking, would you be able to trust that your health care provider had good advice for you? The answer is probably yes. Most health care professionals would tell you to throw out […]
Listening Through the Holidays
As the holidays approach, many people find themselves facing tricky or down right difficult interpersonal situations. Maybe you are worried about your brother and get mad at him for always getting drunk at the family Christmas party. Maybe you are worried about a friend, who you know is trying to stay sober and is facing […]
Listening to Resolve Conflicts
We all have difficulty at times communicating in our close relationships, with our children, parents, partners, siblings and friends. When substances are involved, communication breaks down even more, leaving conflict high and the potential to connect and plan for change low. At these times arguments, mandates, and ultimatums can be the norm, when compromise, collaboration […]
Don’t Take it Personally!
If you are a family member of someone with a substance problem, you have probably heard suggestions that include distancing yourself, using tough love, or detaching until your loved one bottoms out and decides to change. On one hand, given how awful you feel (e.g., constantly angry, tired, scared), these recommendations can make a lot […]
What to Look For in a Treatment Program
We currently live in a country where the attitude and swirl around substance use issues is very intense. Our country has long stigmatized the problem of addiction and most people develop their ideas about the struggle based on TV shows and anecdotal stories they hear in school, at work, and in the press. The recent […]
Falling Into Line in an Effort to Help Your Child
In the May edition of the newsletter we started a discussion about developing alignment with your partner/caregiver to achieve more of your goals in helping your child with their substance use choices. We outlined a list of questions about how you historically have collaborated with your co-parent. What have your patterns been in working together? […]
How to Talk When You Think They’re Lying
There’s are many common myths about people who struggle with substance use disorders. One of the oldest and well known is that all substance users have profound character flaws that results in chronic lying. In fact, if you google “addicts are liars” you find a list of 408,000 articles that discuss this very topic (https://goo.gl/HwWTKf). […]
No, Really, It’s Not About the Nail
Have you ever had a conversation where you really just want to vent to someone, and they seem intent on solving your problem? Of course you have. Maybe you’ve even been the problem solver, and noticed the reaction of the person sitting across from you. In situations like these, the end result is frustration on […]