Below is a list of books for families and significant others that we use and refer to as professionals.
Written by CMC Directors Dr. Jeffrey Foote, Dr. Carrie Wilkens, and Dr. Nicole Kosanke, Beyond Addiction: How Science and Kindness Help People Change is written specifically for families and friends of people who have a substance use problem. It provides them with everything they need to better understand the problem they face and teaches them to become active, compassionate and effective participants in the change process. Using empathic and easy to understand explanations, Beyond Addiction gives readers the most current information science has to offer about how substances affect the reward centers of the brain and motivation. The authors explain what science has taught us about the change process (specifically about why it is so hard!) and offer detailed and incredibly helpful strategies (including homework) for improving communication, reinforcing positive change, taking care of yourself, and helping your loved one decide to make real changes. The book is also a roadmap for navigating the complex and confusing substance abuse treatment world, from psychiatrists to rehabs, medications to AA. While they give these facts, they also offer a compelling challenge to the stigma and negative assumptions many people have about issues of addiction (“admitting to being an alcoholic is crucial to real change”, “abstinence is only acceptable goal”, “and addicts share a set of common characteristics”).
Most importantly, the book offers a new, empowered and positive role for families. Instead of talking about enabling, tough love and detaching, the book teaches readers how to tap the transformative power of relationships to support positive change. In a compassionate and supportive style, Beyond Addiction guides the reader through what research shows us really works, and provides practical exercises and examples.
The Parent’s 20 Minute Guide helps parents utilize CRAFT (Community Reinforcement and Family Training) and Motivational Techniques to help you change your child’s substance use. Family members who are trained in CRAFT are more likely (than those trained to do interventions or who attend Al-Anon) to reduce or stop substance use in their loved one as well as increase the loved one’s willingness to get help. In CRAFT, the concerned family member (that’s you!) also feels better. This guide will help you with such tools as: How to react when your child has been using substances and when he has NOT been using; How to co-parent and collaborate as effectively and smoothly as possible; Getting more of what you want to see from your child and less of what you don’t; How to talk to your child so that you are more likely to be heard; How to take care of yourself all along the way
First, we love Anne Fletcher. As a person who is engaged, curious, funny and in touch with her humanity and all the vulnerability that comes along with it.
Second, we love her books. Sober for Good has helped many of our clients see the multiple paths through their pain and struggle with substance use. This new book helps shed light on the world of treatment that they may or may not face as they decide to tackle their problem.
Third, we love the challenge she has laid out to the addiction treatment world. Will treatment programs change and incorporate the evidence?! We believe her curiosity and willingness to challenge the system will help people ask the right questions as they embark on the path to change. Unfortunately, we hear many of the stories in Anne’s book time and again.
At CMC we encounter something we call “treatment trauma” which is the experience many of our clients have had in treatment programs that are confrontational, aggressive and not psychiatrically sophisticated. They leave humiliated, mis-diagnosed and skeptical about getting help. Thankfully, we hear the positive stories as well. Those of life-changing moments in treatment where individual and families embrace real change.
We hope her book continues to challenge the programs that need to change in order to be in line with the evidence that is available to us. And we hope that our clients and their families, feel emboldened to ask the right questions and to insist that their treatment providers are up to date with the best techniques and approaches available to them.
First…this book is where it all started. It’s written by Bob Meyers, the heart and soul of CRAFT. In our work at CMC we have handed it out more times than we can count!
Second…everyone loves the title and relates to it immediately!
Third…it is a quick, user friendly easy review of CRAFT and it’s core skills.
This book goes over the Community Reinforcement and Family Training (CRAFT) approach for Concerned Significant Others (CSOs) to improve their own quality of life and help motivate their substance-using loved one into treatment.
Geared towards both substance users and their loved ones, this book reviews the different options for substance use treatment, as well as the causes and different theories of substance use problems.
This is a practical and heartfelt evidence based guide that addresses many of the emotional and day to day issues parents and children face before, during, and after divorce. It provides parents with insight into a child’s perspective on divorce and provides strategies for addressing these issues. Dr. Pedro Carroll shares many helpful communication and logistical suggestions for parents to reduce stress on their children and themselves. “Putting Children First” helps make the painful divorce transition as loving and supportive as possible, for all involved.
“The Truth about Children and Divorce” is the product of Dr. Emery’s twenty five years of experience as a psychologist, mediator, researcher and college professor specializing in research and clinical work on families and divorce. This guide is invaluable for anyone going through a divorce with the desire to truly put their children first. Dr. Emery writes from the evidence based notion that how parents cope during and after the divorce is key to children’s resilience in coping. He gives parents the necessary motivation and tools for taking on and accomplishing this incredibly important and simultaneously challenging task. An invaluable work for any family dealing with divorce.
Written by an expert in the field of divorce mediation, The Two Roads to Divorce challenges traditional contentious, courtroom based divorce proceedings and offers an important perspective for parents on how to divorce with integrity and kindness. It offers important suggestions on how and when to talk with children about the decision to divorce and how to make arrangements that work best for all involved. This book is practical, well written, and a quick read.
A sociologist provides stories and data on coping with a loved one’s mental illness.
Very well-reviewed…described by one reviewer as a “step-by-step guide to more successful interpersonal relationships between families and patients.”
Gives readers guidance on understanding and dealing with a loved one’s mental illness.
The author draws on her own experience with a schizophrenic son as she gives advice on balancing the needs of the whole family and on dealing effectively with common and serious symptoms.
Helps friends and family to understand Borderline Personality Disorder, to set boundaries, and to help their loved ones stop relying on Borderline Personality behaviors.
Provides tools to “get off the emotional rollercoaster and repair relationships with loved ones with Borderline Personality Disorder.”
Offers specific, practical and realistic tips on how a couple can work together as a team to create a treatment plan that teaches them to live with the illness while still maintaining a loving and joyful relationship. (Though this book is written for couples, friends and family members can use the techniques in the book as well.)